Author Topic: Seeking wisdom and guidance as another chapter of my life comes to a close...  (Read 6420 times)

Offline TechnoEthicist

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Ah, the life of a graduate student intern. You are hired for a particular set of projects and then are told at the end, hope it was a great experience, thanks for the help, and then you are left to fend for yourself. I just had a meeting with my research director who basically told me that my current work will likely wrap up around September 15th. I know God's timing is perfect and his hand of providence never fails (as many of you know of the many blessings Gretel and I have been given over time) so I know that He is in control. I simply ask for patience and wisdom to understand and ensure I make sound financial decisions as I find my next learning experience.  In other news, The literature review has started, the dissertation is popping up in the rear view mirror! AHH! Thank you all for your encouragement and support...

Offline TechnoEthicist

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A quick update, and a new request. I have been blessed by being able to remain at my current internship for at least an extra week while I try to figure out the next steps. And then I get the option to interview for an graduate assistantship at American University as an academic advisor for the Center of Diversity and Inclusion. And that is the part that needs prayer. Being a liberal campus, I am afraid for what programs and events I may have to set up that shows that homosexuality and its practices is okay or other things along that nature. I know that a welcoming environment is very important for academic success, but I also don't want to speak on things I do not believe in. It's all entirely possible that being concerned about these potential issues is nothing more than my mind trying to cause me to doubt my ability to help others, but nonetheless I am hitting these thoughts head on and asking for my brothers and sisters to help bathe this opportunity in prayer, that I will have the wisdom for the right words to say without going against my beliefs. Thanks!

Offline Josh

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Praying for you brother.
If creation sings Your praises so will I
If You gave Your life to love them so will I

Offline Prof Underwood

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The time is coming when it won't matter whether it is a "liberal campus" or not because any position with a center of "diversity" and "inclusion" will include aspects of the job that support homosexuality as an valid alternative lifestyle.

I think the key would be to approach it like Daniel & friends going into the royal court of Babylon.  He did his best to support the king, but refused to break any of God's commands to do so.  In his case that meant avoiding certain foods, refusing to bow to idols, and continuing to pray despite laws banning it.  In your case it will be other issues, but like them you must be willing to lose your job (or even your life) rather than compromise on clear teachings of scripture.

But if you do it right, then you can serve in Babylon and still be the Godly man that I know you want to be.

slugfencer

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Definitely a great opportunity to be a witness for God in this godless setting. Praise the Lord!
You can do it, and God has been preparing you for such a time as this, to be a light in the darkness.
No need to doubt--who better would God want in such a position than a strong Christian?!? It makes perfect sense.
He will give you the words to speak in love to this situation as you come across it and help you minister to others.
 
Matthew 10:16
See, I send you out as sheep among wolves. Be then as wise as snakes, and as gentle as doves.

Offline Korunks

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Prayers going up for you Bro.
In AMERICA!!

Offline TechnoEthicist

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Hey all, just a quick update.

I signed for an online tutoring service and will have my first student to work with next week. It's not much but it will definitely allow me to cover expenses for Christmas gifts for the family without touching the living expense loan money I took out for college courses so praise God for that! I'm also in the process of applying for two different advising positions so we'll see what happens, but I know through all of this that God is in control. I just want to ensure I am not being lazy or a poor steward of the resources I have been given to manage. Thank you all for your prayers and support!

Offline YourMathTeacher

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I just want to ensure I am not being lazy or a poor steward of the resources I have been given to manage.

This is certainly not the image I have of you, even though we have never met. I'm sure you're doing the best you can under the circumstances.

Out of curiosity, does your online tutoring take place through chat and message boards, or do you use a virtual classroom like BlackBoard's Elluminate?
My wife is a hottie.

Offline TechnoEthicist

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Three interviews, three replies from organizations saying that they went with someone else...how bad is it that all I really want for Christmas is a job...I know there's a reason, but when I'm living on basically borrowed money it's very difficult to have faith...could really use encouragement right now...

Offline Prof Underwood

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Three interviews, three replies from organizations saying that they went with someone else...how bad is it that all I really want for Christmas is a job...I know there's a reason, but when I'm living on basically borrowed money it's very difficult to have faith...could really use encouragement right now...
God always has a good plan for your life.  Seek Him first and all these things shall be added unto you :)

Offline wyatt_marcum

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jeremiah 29:11
   For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you, not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future.
これは現実の生活ですか。これはただのファンタジーですか。土地のスライドは、現実からの脱出でキャッチ。あなたの目を開きます。見て、空とを参照してください。私はちょうど貧しい少年、同情は要りませんので、私

Offline TechnoEthicist

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It's hard to believe that after nearly four years of graduate school, complete with its celebrations and challenges, I am finally at the point to take the most important academic exam of my life (and no I get no lifelines :P), my qualification exam. After I pass I demonstrate to my university and to other scholars that I am ready to move towards joining in their circle. I think the only time that I was more nervous is when I was waiting anxiously to propose to Gretel back in Columbus at Nationals 2008 (BTW, who thought it was a great idea to have me do deck checks beforehand :P?). I say all of this not to rest on my laurels, but rather to praise God for the path I have been brought this far and to ask for continued prayers from my brothers and sisters that this next experience will be an opportunity for me to demonstrate my knowledge to the academic community and provide me the chance to speak on behalf of those who have little to no voice, to use my standing to help others see that students need help in order to be successful and achieve their dream of a degree. So if you don't see me on much in the next two weeks, that's where I'll be, huddled in my computer office with all of my notes from grad school and a ton of books around me. Still no employment at this point, but I think God knew I needed this season, to reflect, to determine what was really important, and to remember no matter what happens He is in control. Blessings to you all...

Chris

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Praying for you. You might want to consider having a small tournament the day of, and checking decks, since apparently that's worked out for you pretty well.

Offline Prof Underwood

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I praise God with you pal.  Having been along for the ride from before that proposal to now, it's been good to see how you have weathered the storms, and continue to bring glory to God.  Keep up the good work, and hopefully God will reveal His next steps for you sooner rather than later :)

Offline TechnoEthicist

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Exam submitted! Thank you all for your prayers and patience with any mistakes in trades or delays that may have occurred while my brain was previously occupied. Now I wait for the results and lean on God to show me the next opportunity to pursue. Blessings to you all!

Offline TechnoEthicist

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I just received word that I have reached candidacy status...after working for so long it seems like a dream. After returning from an amazing conference on campus advising and am really at a loss for words right now...still nothing new on the job front at the moment, but have heard about some amazing prospects including a new initiative that works with high school students as they enter community college and eventually a 4yr institution...I thank you all for your prayers and support and I pray that I keep my ears tuned towards hearing what's next :).

Offline Lampy 2.0

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Congratulations! God is certainly good, isn't he?
"You obviously don't comprehend the level of insane I operate at." - The Doctor

Offline TechnoEthicist

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Warning: This is going to be a long prayer request as I am sharing what's on my heart to my brothers and sisters. Long story short, still no job 8 months later. Asking for prayers of wisdom with decisions and patience to wait on God...The rest is explained below...

So I've decided to keep replying to this topic rather than start a new one so others can see how God can work in someone's life as well as a reminder to myself when things look like God is not in control.

Wednesday marks the 8th month I have been without consistent work. To say it has been frustrating to be in this position so long is an understatement. This is the first time since graduating from college with my Bachelors in 2005 that I have been unemployed so long. As a first-generation college graduate, it breaks my heart when I think about all of the hours that my father worked overtime in order for me to have enough to pay for school after federal loans, only to be in this situation. He calls me nearly every week hoping that I have heard more about jobs I applied for and just in my business neglected to inform him. Part of me is at the point of taking just about any job including retail, delivery or whatever. However, by the time I look at the cost of gas and the wages I would be paid, it is just not cost-efficient. My time would be better spent looking for other opportunities and thinking about research. I have been blessed with very loving parents who wanted nothing more than the best for me, but there's that voice in the back of my head that is trying to convince me that all of my extra education has been nothing more than a waste of time and money.

Many of you know that I went back to grad school in order to get the experience to help students follow their dreams, which has a wide variety of paths and directions. About two months ago, I was at an advising conference in New Jersey and heard about a new pilot program at a community college near me that would work with students in high school and then continue to advise them as they went to community college and eventually University of Maryland. I thought this was the perfect opportunity, I could not ask for a better position for my skillset, so I applied eagerly. After all, they are hiring 8 people, so my chances should be pretty good, right? After all, who has the same experience that I do? It was basically Upward Bound with a different name. 6 weeks after that application was submitted, I am still waiting at my computer, refreshing emails and watching my phone from time to time. I know that if I could just get an interview with that organization they would see my passion to help students, and my proven track record....

If you can't tell, unemployment doesn't suit me (does it anyone, really?). It's not right that my wife should have to be the sole income earner while I am at home. It's not right that after working countless hours as a teacher I can't give her the summer off to relax and recharge while I contribute to our income. This is the first year I have not had a job opportunity this summer. Not one internship, not even a research project....Instead, she has to work at a summer camp teaching leadership, which she tells me she enjoys. I am very thankful that she is at a school she loves and whose students love her, but she shouldn't be the only contributor, it's not fair at all. Until we become a two-income household all of our other plans are put on hold, and apartment life is getting stale :P.

Offline TechnoEthicist

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This is the attitude I am fighting with. I have questioned God every step of this journey. Why would He give me this desire to work with students and to help them succeed and still want to research about what more can be done without the means to do so? Part of me has wondered if I have just been foolish in this whole process. And you know what? God answers my frustration with a sermon. A sermon that my pastor gave five years ago when he first joined our church (before we moved to Maryland), and he thought it was overdue. The premise of the story was Matthew 14, when Jesus walked on water. A miraculous feat in itself, too often when I read that story in the past I focus on the ability to walk on water instead of the true point of Christ's demonstration. Many times when I think about the disciples I forget that they were deep sea fishermen, not like my grandfather who went out in his boat with tackle/bait to catch rainbow trout in the river. These men knew the water and the fish that lived in it. They knew what a storm could do to their boat if they were not careful. But when Jesus says to go out in a boat, they trusted Him. And the storms started, and Jesus was nowhere to be seen. Then the storms continue to worsen, almost to a point that's unbearable. And in the wee hours of the morning Jesus appears to them, in the midst of the storm. My pastor reminded me that Peter and I are a lot alike. Peter knew what a storm could do, he was well-versed in his craft. Yet, he walks out to Jesus when told to do so. Why does Peter do this? Did he want to see if it was really Jesus? Or did he want to be part of something even more amazing than he could dream of.

As I'm listening to this story part of me goes, I've heard this before, have faith and you can do everything, keep your eyes on Jesus and everything will be okay, yadda yadda. But then my pastor points out something I never considered before. Peter sees the storm WHILE his eyes were on Jesus. Every time before I heard that Peter heard the wind and waves and that took his focus off Jesus for just a second and that caused him to lose faith. What if Peter saw the storms around Jesus, and that scared him even more? This was the same Jesus that a few chapters back Peter watched in amazement as the storms were quieted with just a word, yet the storms were not stopping. In fact, they may have gotten worse. That's when it hit me, I want Jesus to say "be still" to the storms in my life and instead He allows them to blow harder. Like Peter, Jesus is with me through each and every step of this journey, but it is not time for the storms to stop. So instead, like Peter I cry "Lord, save me!" and cling to Him with every bit of my being. 

I ask for prayers that I will have the faith to continue to do so, and that my mind and heart will be opened to what I am supposed to learn as we go through this storm. I don't want to be depressed, I don't want to think that my life is on hold, I just want direction, a clear path to go down. I know when this is all over and storms recede, like the disciples I will not be able to stop praising God for getting us through this and into a new time of blessing. I know I have been truly blessed in the past, and am blessed beyond measure right now, but we are still surrounded by the storms around us. Thank you all for your prayers and I can't wait to see what God is going to do with this as we move forward.

Offline 777Godspeed

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My prayers are with you and Gretel.....



Godspeed,
Mike
Divine mental biopsy reveals you need psychosurgery
When in doubt  D3.
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Offline Prof Underwood

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I took the liberty of making a general timeline of events related to your education and employment over the last 5 years.

2008 Sept - wondering whether to get a job or go for the PhD after the Masters
2008 Nov - Offered a job that you described as "great start of something much better"
2009 Jan - deciding to go for the PhD
2009 May - Master's thesis is in trouble
2009 Oct - Another job opportunity arises, but is "entry level"
2011 Mar - loss of PhD program, concerned about credibility with big wigs
2013 May - concerned about lack of job and direction

Obviously hindsight is 20/20, but it does seem that there are a couple things that stick out to me.  One is that you consistently say that what motivates you is helping disadvantaged students get a better education.  However, it seems like there have been times when you've had the opportunity to actually do that on a small scale, but were unsatisfied.  Instead you want to gain the prestige in the eyes of man so that you will be listened to regarding changing the overall system.

But it seems that you have been "kicking against the goad" when it comes to higher education.  The Masters ran into problems, the PhD ran into problems.  Maybe the answer is that God is not calling you to change the whole system.  Maybe he wants you to simply change the lives of some specific kids that you can really help.  It reminds me of the starfish story.  Of course I could be misinterpreting things.  Perhaps, God really does want you to change the world, and these are temporary obstacles that Satan is throwing in your path to derail you.  But for some reason, today, it seems like that is not that is not the case.

As always my friend, I will pray for you that God will make His will for you clear, and that you will continue to have the courage to follow wherever He leads :)

Offline MrMiYoda

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Brad, coming from a third world country, I have been trained to pray that Our Lord multiply not just the loaves of bread and fish but the number of hours in a day.

If, after all is said and done, you can rest assured that you can have some quality time with the wife, your studies, and at least 4 hours of sleep, I would take ANY clean job that can give you at least one buck of pure net daily income.  I have literally learned this principle from my 10-year residency in China.

For the past 8 years since 2005 after being laid off from a good-paying HR career after the company of 400 that I had worked for folded, I have been working between two and three part-time jobs.  At first, my logic had always concluded that it would be such an inefficient means to get the buck trickling into the bank account.  Furthermore, my degrees in IT, Education, and Geography had tormented my pride to prevent me from even thinking of getting an entry-level job in the retail field --- just to get by.

But God has His own mysterious ways of letting me know that HE is in control of the wind and the sea, and that HE can choose to make them turbulent as He pleases while carefully focusing His sights on me while I 'walk on the waves' until I'm able to reach for His saving arms.

And so, all I asked God since 2005 was to multiply time for me.  I have discovered these past 8 years that time indeed is something God could easily 'multiply'.  I have temporarily let go of my insistence that ONE stable job is the standard rule -- at least at the moment.  I have let go of even trying to analyze if the job I am going to be accepted in FITS my credentials at all.  This is a very difficult decision I had made as I have never been in to purely part-time work in my career.

I have never been educated to be in the retail business.  I am a IT professional, an educator, and an earth science expert.  Who knew that I had to be in three retail-based jobs and had to be trained as such?  But, in the end, after surrendering even more to God on that fateful day I was laid off, I have realized that God indeed has His mysterious reasons for everything.

If not for the currently extremely part-time nature of my jobs, I would not have been able to:
a.  take my dad to his regular three-doctor appointments that were mostly during the weekdays -- before he passed away.
b.  make time to be with my mom on a few mornings before work just to keep her company after dad passed in late 2011.
c.  serve three incredible bosses who were given to me by God to be flexible with each other's time (none of them have met each other) when I need to cover for any of them when they are away.  By the way, somehow I just realized I was actually doing what I still love best while serving the retail world --- I am actually doing their IT stuff and teaching their employees how to manage the world of computerized technology.  I got my first part-time job at the same religious store that now distributes Cactus Games (I work there twice a week to sell, do IT, and train young part-timers).  I got my other two jobs on separate occasions thru dear old Craiglist.  One is a luggage store (I work 2 days --- I sell, do IT, and help co-workers with their computer issues).  The other is a car aftermarket shop (I work 2 days -- I sell online, do IT, and help my co-workers feel more at ease on their computers)
d.  play Redemption on Thursday nights at ReBirth from 6-8pm.  The neighboring town is hosting this year's Nats.
e.  teach Redemption on some Friday nights at a gaming store.
f.   academically coach a Muslim kid 4 nights a week (I have been his mentor, teacher, and 'godfather' since he was barely 8.  He is a high school junior.  He also knows how to play Redemption together with his bother and three cousins.)
g.  witness a Long-Island-made love affair between a certain young couple named Brad and Gretel -- at Nats 2006.

The whole point of all this is that I know I will have at least more than a buck net when the day is over and after all's said and done.  That 'Chinese' mentality I have learned has made me survive and even cherish my current part-time career.

If you think you can work a few hours a day, and time it when Gretel is at her job, then by all means go for it, no matter how humble the job is and 'unrelated' and 'un-professional' --- I am 100% certain that God will put you in the right humble place --- treat it like your chance to visit a humble stable -- before you finally occupy your 'chair', Dr. Coverdale.  I am sure that the supermarket, or the pizza shop, or the laundromat --- will one day be proud to declare to the world that you once will have touched their hearts with your prayer and witness.

You are and will always be in my prayers --- you and Gretel.

Peace ...... and more Peace!
« Last Edit: May 14, 2013, 03:33:12 AM by ReyZen »
"Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace." --- Francis of Assisi

Offline bballer54

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My prayers are with you. I hope that God will soon direct you to the path He wants you to take.

Offline TechnoEthicist

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Unlike my other threads, I am going to keep this one unedited, not because it's about me, but rather it's an amazing demonstration of God's love by others as well as a living testament that shows that we all go through up and downs in life, no matter how intelligent we are (or think we are :P). After six months of applying for jobs and not receiving as much as a letter saying the position was filled, I was invited to meet with institutional researchers at the community college just down the road from my apartment (kinda amusing that I will be traveling 1.5 hours via public transportation on Friday since Gretel has the car, otherwise I'd be there in 15 minutes driving :P). This was just the confidence booster I needed, even if I do not get the position. I have to give a presentation on a dataset beforehand, which is a first for me in an interview setting, but I am very excited just the same. As always, your prayers are greatly desired, for confidence in myself during the interview, peace when meeting with new people, and grace and mercy to the search committee for any mistakes that are made. I am honored to call you all brothers and sisters and I hope to have incredible news to share soon!

Offline Prof Underwood

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I will pray for you, and am glad that God continues to provide just what you need, just when you need it :)

 


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