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Open Forum => Off-Topic => Topic started by: MichaelHue on February 23, 2009, 09:39:43 AM

Title: Quotes
Post by: MichaelHue on February 23, 2009, 09:39:43 AM
Post any amusing things you've read lately, just for fun.

Fact:
Quote
People are like slinkies. Basically useless, but incredibly entertaining to push down stairs.

Fact.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on February 23, 2009, 09:52:52 AM
Quote
People are like slinkies. Basically useless, but incredibly entertaining to push down stairs.

it's even better when someone is actually IN a suitcase and pushed down the stairs
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Cameron the Conqueror on February 23, 2009, 09:55:59 AM
Fact.
Quote
Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.
Fact.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Colin Michael on February 23, 2009, 10:09:16 AM
Quote
There are no original texts, only interpretations.
-Friedrich Nietzsche

Quote
Act only according to that maxim whereby you can at the same time will that it should become a universal law.
-Immanuel Kant

Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Cameron the Conqueror on February 23, 2009, 10:52:24 AM
Fail.

Quote
From Musicain: it took one amuture and his family to build the ark but it took several men to build the titanic

Fail.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: thestrongangel on February 23, 2009, 11:16:20 AM
Have you ever read the Bible or studied up on the Titanic, Musicain?
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Arch Angel on February 23, 2009, 11:19:49 AM
the point is that Noah and his 3 sons technically is the same thing as "several men"

It's not a very good comparison.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: thestrongangel on February 23, 2009, 12:08:31 PM
Tons of men built the Ark
=
Tons of men built the Titanic.

:P
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: thestrongangel on February 23, 2009, 12:35:45 PM
We don't. But you were wrong on that quote. Sheesh
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on February 23, 2009, 12:46:47 PM
double posting = fail
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Cameron the Conqueror on February 23, 2009, 01:51:54 PM
It should say something like:  It took 3 men to build the Ark while it took tons of men built the Titanic.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Alex_Olijar on February 23, 2009, 02:16:47 PM
Key words are amateurs and engineers
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Vasbear on February 23, 2009, 09:09:00 PM
It should say something like:  It took 3 men to build the Ark while it took tons of men built the Titanic.

Noah, Shem, Ham, Japhith(sp?)

1,2,3,4........not 3
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Warrior_Monk on February 23, 2009, 09:50:19 PM
fact:
Quote
Noah took two of every animal on the ark
(ok... seven of the clean animals...) fact.

Fact:
Quote
there were three pigs
fact.

Fact:
Quote
Noah had three sons, Japeth (sp?), Shem, and Ham
Fact.

Fact:
Quote
three pigs.
Fact.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Cameron the Conqueror on February 23, 2009, 10:11:27 PM
Fact.

Cameron needs to look up the numbers before he posts.

Fact.


Fact.

Musicain was still really wrong ;).

Fact.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: TheKarazyvicePresidentRR on February 23, 2009, 10:17:37 PM
Fact.

This is not a Fact.

Fact.

Fact.

I just broke your mind.

Fact.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Isildur on February 23, 2009, 11:43:18 PM
"The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues."-Elizabeth Taylor (1932 - )
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Ironica on February 24, 2009, 01:12:05 AM
 "1. Why the big secret? People are smart, they can handle it. 2. A *person* is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it."
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Warrior_Monk on February 24, 2009, 09:02:33 AM
Fact.

This is not a Fact.

Fact.

Fact.

I just broke your mind.

Fact.
Fact: the fact below is true. Fact.

Fact: the fact above is false. Fact.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on February 24, 2009, 09:12:06 AM
fact: what your elementary school teachers think they know is false

false: what you think you don't know is fact
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Warrior_Monk on February 24, 2009, 09:29:35 AM
fact: what your elementary school teachers think they know is false

false: what you think you don't know is fact
Quote
wait, was that supposed to be a joke?
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on February 24, 2009, 09:34:14 AM
fact: the above fact is serious

fact:the above false is a joke
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: metalpsalm on February 24, 2009, 11:15:45 AM
Eagles may soar, but a weasle will never be sucked into a jet engine.~ Unknown (to me)
Everywhere is walking distance, if you have the time... Steven Wright
I'm convinced that teenager's idea of washing dishes is to look at them sternly. ~metalpsalm
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: michael/michaelssword on February 24, 2009, 12:31:19 PM
my signature and under picture things are mine
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: SoulSaver on February 24, 2009, 12:40:23 PM
"With great power comes great responsibility."

-Old Ben Parker
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: SoulSaver on February 24, 2009, 12:44:49 PM
"If type 1 multi were a lion, it would be my door mat." -Daniel Whitten :-*



Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Colin Michael on March 09, 2009, 08:26:23 PM
"If I am capable of grasping God objectively, I do not believe, but precisely because I cannot do this I must believe." -Soren Kierkegaard.

"People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use." -Soren Kierkegaard

"Those with insomnia know with certainty that time does not exist". -Jael Holmeberg

"Genuine tragedies in the world are not conflicts between right and wrong. They are conflicts between two rights." -Georg Hegel

"The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently." -Friedrich Nietzsche
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: YourMathTeacher on March 09, 2009, 09:21:14 PM
"I'd just as soon kiss a wookie."  - Princess Leia

"I know."  - Han Solo

"How did your uneducated kind ever take Jerusalem?" - Hazim
"God knows." - Robert of Locksley

"Whoa." - Neo

"Who are you?" - Indigo
"No one of consequence." - Masked Man
"I must know." - Indigo
"Get used to disappointment." - Masked Man

"I'm waiiiitiiiiiiiing."  - Vezzini

"I'll be back." - Terminator

"Roger, Roger." - Battle Droid

"You're lucky my wife wasn't here." - Jefferson Blue

"Woooo-hoooooo!" - Peter Parker

"You know who I am." - Spider-Man

Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: michael/michaelssword on March 09, 2009, 10:39:27 PM
"On a Monday I kiss in elevators and all that jazz"-My friend Dave
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Alex_Olijar on March 09, 2009, 11:14:03 PM
Do or do not. There is no try - A wise little one
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on March 09, 2009, 11:15:49 PM
i got a better princess bride quote for ya ymt

Vezzini: no more rhymes now i mean it

Fezzik: anybody want a peanut?

Vezzini: DAH!!

XD.
tribute to andre the giant
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Lamborghini_diablo on March 09, 2009, 11:21:25 PM
I'll activate the mind-control device AFTER I've properly gloated, NOT before! .... Hehehehe .... Activate the device! - Head Alien
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on March 10, 2009, 11:04:00 AM
"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!" gandolf-
"ROAR whiplash whiplash" beast"
"AHH!! stay with the fools" gondolf-

Gandolf: FLY YOU FOOLS!!!*falls*
Frodo:NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on March 10, 2009, 11:52:31 AM
yeah
fly as in: Run
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: SoulSaver on March 10, 2009, 12:14:23 PM
Yeah
fly as in:Run

-New Raven
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Colin Michael on March 10, 2009, 12:17:32 PM
Fly like when he flew on the bird?

Or is he telling Frodo to stay fly-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i till he die-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-is.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: The Schaef on March 10, 2009, 12:31:27 PM
Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: EmJayBee83 on March 10, 2009, 01:51:44 PM
We've dealt with our share of surprises and made a lot of sacrifices but we've stayed together. You see, you're a better person than I am. And it made me a better person to be around you. I don't know, maybe it was just all a dream. Maybe I went to bed one lonely night in December and I imagined it all. But I swear, nothing has ever felt more real.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: TheKarazyvicePresidentRR on March 10, 2009, 02:02:41 PM
Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?
Clarence....
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on March 10, 2009, 02:05:10 PM
Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?
Clarence....
this reminded me of "it's a wonderful life"
girl: look daddy teacher says, every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings

george: that's right, that's right, atta boy clarence

classic
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: TheKarazyvicePresidentRR on March 10, 2009, 02:14:46 PM
Cuz that is where the quote is from ;)
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Clarinetguy097 on March 10, 2009, 07:51:36 PM
Let's say there was a big, powerful... wait... what?
-My 8th grade math teacher
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: JSB23 on March 10, 2009, 08:59:38 PM
my sig
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: BubbleBoy on March 10, 2009, 09:49:04 PM
"Why do today what you could put off till tomorrow?" - Squidward

"What is today when yesterday's tomorrow?" - Mr. Krabs
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Tsavong Lah on March 10, 2009, 10:31:06 PM
Time for me to geek out. :P

Quote from: Hans Urs von Balthasar
Beauty is the word which shall be our first. Beauty is the last thing which the thinking intellect dares to approach since only it dances as an uncontained splendor around the double constellation of the true and the good and their inseparable relation to one another. Beauty is the disinterested one, without which the ancient world refused to understand itself, a word which both imperceptibly and unmistakably has bid farewell to our new world, a world of interests, leaving it to its own avarice and sadness. No longer loved or fostered by religion, beauty is lifted from its face as a mask, and its absence exposes features on that face which threaten to become incomprehensible to man. We no longer dare to believe in beauty, and we make of it a mere appearance in order the more easily to dispose of it. Our situation today shows that beauty demands for itself at least as much courage and decision as do truth and goodness, and she will not allow herself to be separated and banned from her two sisters without taking them along with herself in an act of mysterious vengeance. We can be sure that whoever sneers at her name, as if she were the ornament of a bourgeois past, whether he admits it or not, can no longer pray and soon will no longer be able to love.

And less deep, but just as awesome:

Leia: I love you!
Han: I know.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Ironica on March 10, 2009, 10:53:01 PM
"1)You know, it just occured to me that we really haven't had a successful test of this equipment. 2) I blame myself. 3) So do I. 1) Well, no sense in worrying about it now. 2) Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back."
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: 777Godspeed on March 10, 2009, 11:07:35 PM
"1)You know, it just occured to me that we really haven't had a successful test of this equipment. 2) I blame myself. 3) So do I. 1) Well, no sense in worrying about it now. 2) Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back."

Classic entertainment. 


Godspeed,
Mike
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: brederic on March 11, 2009, 09:10:38 AM
Be alert.  The world needs more lerts.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: metalpsalm on March 11, 2009, 10:25:19 AM
If I have 23 odds and ends on a table, and 22 of them fall off, what do I have left? An Odd or an End???  ~ George Carlin
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: michael/michaelssword on March 11, 2009, 12:09:02 PM
"Strange Women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis of a government.'' -Annoying Peasant
"It be merely a flesh wound'-Black Knight

who else is addicted to Monty Python  ;D they're the best comedians ever
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: The Schaef on March 11, 2009, 12:13:25 PM
Yes, THEY are.

"You don't frighten us, English pig dogs. Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you, so-called "Arthur King," you and all your silly English Kunnnnnnnigguts."
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Isildur on March 11, 2009, 11:42:05 PM
'NI!"-Knights who say NI!
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: TheKarazyvicePresidentRR on March 12, 2009, 02:58:45 PM
"Ya know, Had the tire blown out when he was doing 100+ we woulda flipped.... and probably died." - Me

"Yeah I know..." - Friend

"If I die like that, put on my epitaph... "Do a barrel Roll" - me

"If that ever happens to me, Imma yell that as we flip through mid air." - Friend

Remember kids. Do a barrel roll.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: TheKarazyvicePresidentRR on March 12, 2009, 03:46:15 PM
LOL!!! OH MY GOSH!!!! DID THAT ACTUALY HAPPEN!?!?!?!?!?!?!
We did not flip but I really had that conversation. Insane friend + 100Mph in traffic=scary.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Colin Michael on March 12, 2009, 04:41:30 PM
he goes like 10mph/15mph in a parking lot 
I take it you've never been parking-lot drift racing?
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: PresidentOrangeBus on March 12, 2009, 05:13:38 PM
Drift racin in parking lots is good times.. And I go like 25 in my work parking lot lol.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on March 12, 2009, 06:17:43 PM
"do you drink 2% just because you think your fat? cause your not you could drink whole" -napolian dynamite

"Napoleon, don't be jealous cause i've been chatting online with babes, all day"-kip

"vote for pedro"-on napoleon's shirt

"looks like a medievil warrior"-napoleon

"such an idiot!"napoleon

"you think anyone wants a roundhouse kick to the face while i'm wearing these bad boys?"-Rex

"come here boy!" - Rex

"well, can't find my check book. hope you don't mind if i pay ya in change"- farmer

" *rico takes kip's steak and chucks it at napoleon, hitting napoleon on the side of the face*
napoleon-what the heck do you think your doing?!

Kip- now that's what i'm talkin about"

i'v watched ALOT of napoleon dinamite lol
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Lawfuldog on March 12, 2009, 06:32:04 PM
You missed the best ones.

"I used to be able to throw a pig skin a quarter mile" and "I bet I could throw a football over 'dem mountains."
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: jtay on March 12, 2009, 08:26:15 PM
Here's a quote from a homework problem I'm working on currently:


"You hurriedly stuff the strangely spherical potatoes of radius 4 cm into your convection oven."
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: TheKarazyvicePresidentRR on March 13, 2009, 08:35:30 PM
:o :o i would be freaking out! so.. did you take the time to wittness to him? (that is if he wasnt a christian). lol wow thers a guy i know like that he goes like 10mph/15mph in a parking lot  :o now that is scary. but pray for that guy he has cancer (that they cant heal) and we dont know if he is saved or not.
He is saved, this guy goes 30 mph :-p
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: MichaelHue on March 14, 2009, 04:11:28 PM
:o :o i would be freaking out! so.. did you take the time to wittness to him? (that is if he wasnt a christian). lol wow thers a guy i know like that he goes like 10mph/15mph in a parking lot  :o now that is scary. but pray for that guy he has cancer (that they cant heal) and we dont know if he is saved or not.
He is saved, this guy goes 30 mph :-p
Good thing, too ;)
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Clarinetguy097 on March 14, 2009, 08:33:53 PM
I hope to rule the world by the time I'm 15. -Girl I sit by in science

She's going to rule the world in 3 months -New Girl

I'm disturbed -me
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: TheKarazyvicePresidentRR on March 15, 2009, 01:45:01 AM
"I was going to take over the world but I got distracted by something shiny."
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Colin Michael on March 23, 2009, 04:14:04 AM
"Everybody must get stoned!" -Bob Dylan.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Colin Michael on April 04, 2009, 08:55:35 PM
how can it be male and an enhancment?



BEST. POST. EVER.
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on April 04, 2009, 09:03:19 PM
for once i agree with colin
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Arch Angel on April 04, 2009, 09:03:50 PM
I think the boards are going to explode now :O ;)
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: New Raven BR on April 04, 2009, 09:05:05 PM
it's the final countdown til the boards' grand explosion of laughter
Title: Re: Quotes
Post by: Colin Michael on April 04, 2009, 09:06:19 PM
it's the final countdown til the boards' grand explosion of laughter
http://www.playlist.com/searchbeta/tracks#final%20countdown%20europe (http://www.playlist.com/searchbeta/tracks#final%20countdown%20europe)
Such a hilariously bad song.
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